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ReMindful - Your Self-Care Is Never Just For You (5:26 mins)



One of the big sticking points that can stop us from looking after ourselves properly, from engaging in acts of self care, is this sense of guilt that can come along when we feel that it's a bit too self indulgent to be taking time away from work, away from important other people that need our attention too.

So the message behind this video is that your acts of self care are never really just about you. I remember many moons ago when I first started meditating, I used to think

 that meditation was something that I did by myself, for myself, to sort out my stuff. So it was all about me, and there was more than one occasion when I felt a bit bad about taking time away from the family to be so isolated in this way.

But you know what? Over the years... My attitude towards meditating and why I meditate has changed.

 Now it has far less to do with just me and far more

 to do with how I show up for others. Particularly when it comes to showing understanding and patience and generosity of attention and compassion for what others are going through.

And I really do believe that it's taking the time to practice meditation, mindfulness in my case, that has helped me to become a better parent, a better partner, a better friend, a better colleague. A better global citizen. And one of the most important things that I've realized through my practice is that the act of practicing being in wise and caring relationship with others is in itself a brilliant act of self care.

Because feeling even more connected to others in a caring way, seems to have done wonders for my own well being. And that doesn't mean that I always put others needs ahead of my own at the expense of my own needs and putting myself last, or being a doormat in any way. It simply means practicing holding the best interests of others very close to my heart.

And practicing is the operative word here.

 And one of the ways that I like to practice this is at the beginning and end of every meditation I spend a moment dedicating any benefit that I get from the meditation to the benefit and welfare of everyone, all beings, which of course includes me as well. And what I've noticed is that through consistently holding this intention, not only has that given a certain kind of purpose and a more meaningful reason to get my bum on a chair and meditate in the first place, gradually over time, I've experienced myself being kinder, being more understanding, and being more emotionally available for others.

Which, of course, feels great for me, but it's also something that I consider to be, you know, a small act of service to them as well. So the point of this video and an invitation to you is any time you're about to do something for yourself as an act of self care, whether that's taking five minutes to relax and enjoy a cup of tea or head off to the gym or sit down and meditate, this is particularly pertinent if you ever feel guilty about taking that type of time for yourself, is to top and tail it with stating an intention that not only are you doing this to benefit yourself, but also you're doing it for the good and welfare of those people that you care about too.

You could say, may my moment of self care be of benefit to all -including me. Now you can phrase that any way that you wish. The important thing is that it's stated in a way that you feel good about and that you can connect to the sentiment behind it. And you know what? I'd love if you would pop down in the comments and share what are the ways that you feel other people also benefit from your acts of self care.

I'd love to chat with you about that. In fact, it's engaging with you in the comments that that's what it's all about for me because without that I'm just a weird bloke with a selfie stick by a river looking a bit silly. Anyway, be well, take great care of yourself, speak soon.

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